It doesn’t take much to make someone happy. A few seconds of kindness can easily turn someone’s whole day around.
Here are seven things you can do to make someone’s day.
- Point out something you admire. A quick and powerful way to generate good feelings is to complete the following sentence: I admire the way you… For example: I admire the way you balance your work and home life; I admire the way you handled that upset customer; I admire the way you care for your sick husband.
- Make your conversational partner the hero of a story. I have a friend who comforted one of my relatives years ago by singing to my relative when she was sick. The first time I recounted the story, my friend told me that she had no idea that the singing meant so much to me. Don’t leave your kind words locked inside you. Assume that the other person has no idea how much his or her action meant to you. If you are right, you will have shared a treasure that might otherwise have remained buried. And if you are wrong, big deal. That just means you made someone feel good twice.
- Give substantive compliments. Although people appreciate compliments of any kind, compliments that are connected to effort and accomplishment last longer. Upgrade your compliments from routine (I love your shirt; Your hair looks great; Nice pants) to substantive (I appreciate the way you keep the peace around here; You are great at helping me clarify my thoughts; I’m so glad to have someone with great writing skills like you working on this project).
- Say something nice about someone close to your conversational partner. People love compliments about their children, their family, and even about the people who report to them at work (most of the time). Generally, people will be pleased whenever you compliment them on someone they have spent their time and energy developing.
- Acknowledge good intentions when things go wrong. Don’t deploy your kindness only when everything is going right. You can acknowledge a valiant effort that failed, a worthy project that floundered, or a good idea that never got the chance to take off. Kind words in the face of adversity are often very important to the other person.
- Thank people for specific things. Thank your colleague for getting you the information you needed early; thank your aunt for cooking you chicken noodle soup; thank your client for selecting you for the new project; and thank your mechanic for telling you that you really didn’t need a new set of spark plugs. Specificity strengthens your expressions of gratitude.
- Listen attentively. Listening connects people together, and sends a clear signal that you value the other person. Listening without interruption and without distraction is a powerfully simple way to make someone’s day.
Don’t keep compliments, kind stories, or words of admiration locked up inside. A few moments of kind, thoughtful communication will often make someone’s day.