It’s difficult to hit a bull’s-eye when a target is in motion, and it’s just as hard to achieve a conversational goal when a discussion bounces from topic to topic. Three actions will help prevent drift in strategic conversations so you can give your goals the best chance of success.
1. Clarify your goal. Don’t start a strategic conversation (that is, a conversation where you are trying to accomplish something) before you can articulate in one sentence what you want to achieve (your conversational goal). To a coworker: “I want to let Dan know that his delayed report cost us the Gatorville account.” To a spouse: “I want to ask Sally to vacation with my sister’s family this Thanksgiving.” To a boss: “I’d like Judy to approve my request to attend a communication training session in Las Vegas.”
2. Avoid tangents and other distractions. When Dan starts to talk about yesterday’s staff meeting, when Sally asks you questions about the grocery list, and when Judy tells you about her cat, Mr. Muffins, it’s time to gently redirect them back to your conversational goal by using restatements or questions to recover from the drift. To Dan, “Could we talk about the Gatorville account? I want us to avoid such client losses in the future.” To Sally, “Honey, I’ll put the grocery list together after dinner. In the meantime, would you please consider spending next Thanksgiving with my sister?” To Judy, “Mr. Muffins sure is pretty,” (and then pause slightly before continuing): “Will it be okay for me to attend the communication training session?”
3. Be prepared for new and significant information that renders your goal obsolete or topics that take priority. Sometimes you learn information that makes it sensible to shelve your goal temporarily, or another topic emerges that supersedes your intended goal. Dan may tell you that he’s leaving the company. Sally may want to talk about the family budget before making a decision about Thanksgiving travel. And your boss might want to talk about tomorrow’s committee meeting before fielding your request to go to Vegas. Abandon a goal that’s become irrelevant, and shelve your goal for a future conversation—or for later in the discussion—if another topic takes precedence.
Don’t let strategic conversations catch a drift. Your goals deserve your focused effort.
Originally posted on mouthpeaceconsulting.com.