If the thought of spending holiday time with certain family members is already causing you indigestion, here are some quick tips for avoiding harmful holiday fights with five predictable types of difficult people:

The constant critic. Aunt Sally finds fault with the way you manage your home . . . and so much more.

Tip: Don’t let her push your buttons and get what she wants—a response. Take a breath, say nothing, and let it go. Your anger and frustration will only make the situation worse.

The relentless arguer. Uncle Jim wants to argue with you about politics, current events, or almost anything.

Tip: If you don’t want to argue, don’t. Practice your listening skills instead and bone up on the fine art of rendering a well-placed “um-hmm.”

The graceless questioner. Your cousin Willy asks: “Weren’t you supposed to get a promotion last year?” and “How come you aren’t married yet?”

Tip: Answer as simply and as blandly as possible: “Promotions are on hold company-wide because of budget constraints” or “I’m still looking for Ms. Right.” Don’t escalate an uncomfortable situation into a damaging one by taking offense at a relative’s poor questioning habits.

The unsolicited advisor. Your other cousin Billy knows just what you should be doing to straighten out your job, your family, and—for that matter—your life.

Tip: You aren’t going to act on his advice anyway, so you might as well just let him talk. Besides, it’s easier than trying—and probably failing—to get him to stop.

The shameless discloser. Your sister-in-law Connie tells you way too much about what’s going on in her private life.

Tip: Whatever you do, don’t express any interest in what you’re hearing. Put on your best poker face and pretend she’s reciting her grocery list. With any luck, she’ll take the hint and stop spilling her secrets.

It takes two to escalate a conversation, but any one person can prevent relationship damage. Don’t allow your response to a difficult person transform an awkward or irritating holiday moment into a damaging one.

Question: What strategies do you use to neutralize difficult people at the holidays? Please leave a comment to continue the discussion.

For additional communication strategies with difficult people at the holidays and beyond, see Chapter 11 of Start Talking, Start Communicating.

Originally posted on mouthpeaceconsulting.com.